What is love? Does love mean supporting someone in doing whatever they feel gives them present satisfaction? Or is love telling someone the truth, even when it’s difficult? Regardless of what culture dictates, it is possible for Christians to condemn homosexual activity while still fiercely loving the individual who self-identifies as “gay”. Stand to Reason author and speaker Alan Shlemon shares several compelling arguments on this topic:
If you say someone is wrong, you’re labeled as mean, hateful, or some other pejorative term. This is especially true when it comes to homosexuality. If you believe your friend or family member’s homosexual behavior is morally wrong, you’re probably thought of as unloving. Indeed, it’s no longer enough to tolerate a person who satisfies their same-sex attraction; you’re expected to celebrate them.
It’s not just non-believers who think this way. I hear this kind of talk even from Christians who adopt pro-gay theology, the view that the Bible is gay-affirming or neutral about homosexual sex. They usually baptize this idea by saying God loves everyone and we’re all His children. While it’s certainly true God loves everyone, He also makes moral demands throughout the Bible.
What so many arguments today fail to point out is that while God loves us unequivocally, He does not tell us to live according our whims. He gives us free will, but also a moral code to guide us.
You may hear another argument by proponents of homosexuality: if a person has inborn desires, then “who are we to judge” what is right for them? But this attitude ignores the most basic understanding of sin: that we all have innate desires drawing us toward sin, simply because it is part of the human condition. Yet nowhere in the Bible does God tell us, “do what feels right to you, in all circumstances.”
The good news is that while God always condemns sin, He also understands our fallen nature and is willing and eager to forgive. He will never leave us in our sin as long as we readily seek His forgiveness.
All through Scripture we see God and Jesus point out sin but still love the people who engage in it. Romans 5:8 says, “But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” We not only engaged in wrong behavior, our attitudes and inclinations were against God. That’s because we’re all born with a spiritually genetic condition that produces a natural inclination towards beliefs, desires, and behaviors that God says are wrong. We’re all born that way. We all have an orientation towards sin. Despite our moral crimes and hostility towards God, He still loves us.
Condemning sin and speaking the truth with grace is actually one of the highest forms of love. Why? Because it shows another person that you want the best for them; it shows an investment in their soul and eternal life. Culture may shout accusations of “hate” and “bigotry” to silence the truth, but it is possible to hate the sin and still love the sinner.
